Choices You Can Make in a Life of Chronic Pain
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Either I accept my limitations and challenge them
Or I use them as an excuse to lose my life, without putting up a fight.
Either I lie here and feel the full weight of my self-pity
Or I rise up and do just one thing that is productive.
Either I sit here during this commercial
Or I arise off my seat and perform one quick chore.
I either water that pot of African violets
Or I watch them wither and die.
I either walk down the stairs to let the dog out to pee
Or face the consequences with paper towels in hand.
I either snatch a small fragment of time to be productive
Or I achieve nothing, willingly and without guilt. What’s with all this guilt, anyway?
Either I consider the act of resting to be healing and do it without guilt
Or consider it wasteful and of little importance. I’m the judge of my own life.
I either decide to do too much, a little something
Or do nothing at all. It’s up to me.
Either I give into the sucking power of my disease
Or I give it one hell of a fight.
I either lift that 2.5 lb. weight to strengthen my arms and neck
Or I give in to the wasted muscles and sagging arms. No more evening gowns or waving in parades for me.
Either I pull out that stretchy band and give it many good yanks, counting as I go, five more each day
Or I will put it off until tomorrow, then tomorrow and once again, tomorrow.
Either I listen to my own conscience and do what I have learned to do to feel better
Or I berate myself for not being all that I can be; whatever that may be I’ll end up never knowing and that would be a pity of stupendous proportions.
I either kick myself in the ass
Or wait, hoping someone else will do it for me…gently, of course.
Either I lie to myself, time and time again and desensitize my inner truth
Or I love myself enough to tell me to be honest with me, myself, alone.
I either choose foods that are wholesome, healthy and wise
Or I will face the consequences. Ignorance of dietary law is no excuse.
I will either occasionally treat myself to chocolate, ice cream or some other delight
Or my life will be very dull. Hey, I’m only human. Moderation is the key.
Either I look both ways when crossing the street
Or I may get mowed down by a fast moving car or the Road Runner.
I either choose to be clean, and presentable
Or I am stinky, anti-social and disgusting and others will flee from me.
Either I smile
Or I frown.
Either I am a grouchy, querulous whining witch
Or I am as congenial and pleasant as I know how to be. I’m usually somewhere in the middle.
Either I remember my behavior will come back to me, much like a boomerang
Or I continue to infest those around me with negativity and doom.
I either love myself enough to work at being as healthy as possible
Or I watch myself disintegrate and fall into disrepair.
Either I know the potential in what is possible, and believe and attempt to achieve,
Or I just say, “Oh, to hell with it” and give up now.
Either I bother
Or I don’t.
I either roll over
Or get rolled upon.
Either I acknowledge my limits and seek to expand them
Or I dissolve into a weak, shriveled mass of protoplasm.
I either love myself
Or I show contempt for myself.
Either I put up with inferior, insensitive medical care
Or I speak up and love myself enough to express my honest feelings.
Either I shut up and put up with the status quo
Or I reward myself with having the courage to make a better life for myself.
Either I say, “I may be a patient but I don’t have to be a victim.”
Or I give it up and rollover and stick my legs in the air like a gassed cockroach.
I either accept the things I must, decide which things about me I can change
Or I will inadvertently be allowing life to dictate to me.
I will either choose fight
Or flight. I need to recognize I have power and call upon it and use it. Fight or flight? Depends on the day you ask me; both can be good.
Either I learn to know myself
Or I will be left living with a stranger.
Video: Career choices: They don't have to be decisions for life | Orla Donoghue | TEDxTallaght
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