Being a Friend to Your Child - Sadhguru

How to Be a Friend to Children


  1. Play with them.Start with regular play, such as building Lego cities or playing with blocks- anything you are certain they will enjoy. They will learn to appreciate you and a connection will start to form if you interact with them on their level. No matter how little time you have at home, try as much as possible to find time for these activities.
  2. Keep in mind that provision is based on needs, not wants.Provide what you can afford and let them know your limits. It is always good to provide things like clothing and food for a child or children that you see daily. Being kind teaches them that humanity is about kindness and helping each other.
    • Make known to the child(ren) that you work hard to provide these things. Discuss this during outings, jogging or strolls. Let them know why you provide for them and attach some to the fact that they, in turn, need to give you compensation for it in the form of good behavior or performance in school. Discuss this openly and give them what is necessary in terms of their field of study or talents, their specific needs and the like.
    • Don’t be a harsh and demanding person. You will scare them away and you become a person who is feared but not respected. A person who provides and guides kids gain lot of respect and love. You also may help an orphan and showed them love that they wish in their lives.
  3. Meet in groups.Conduct meetings where every child is allowed to state what they want to be in life. In response, give them some form of guide or advice. Allow each child to say what hurts them and engage them in basic discussions based on age and sense of reasoning. Let them provide important things that will contribute to their dreams and future career. Be a guide and not a ruler. It is at this time that you can even shape their dreams and make them see and value team work and team ties.
  4. Say what you mean and mean what you say.As a role model, try to be just and right. Make the child(ren) know the difference between "yes" and "no". Try to be fair, open and clear whenever you make a decision. Be calm but straightforward.
    • When you make a decision and you want to change your mind later, there should be a sound reason that is seen and considered as valid. Do not say what you cannot do or what seem impossible. Try to be just and clear in your decisions. Speak as genuinely as you can. Remember that children see more than they can hear.
  5. Avoid using violence as a control method.It is not a good practice to argue with a spouse or partner in front of any child(ren). Try to be a gentle as you can. Utilize calm conflict-resolution skills. Whenever you feel yourself getting worked up, count to ten and take deep breaths as to not lose your temper. This does not mean you cannot get vexed or annoyed, but try to control your anger. Be a community role model.
  6. Be genuine.Don’t be a hypocritical person. False promises and unnecessary engagements are not good for children to witness. Children will distrust a father who knows how to promise but does not know how to fulfill. It is good to surprise your kids with necessary gifts and things that can contribute to their growth and development. Don’t use these ties to molest, exploit or abuse the kids. They trust you and at this stage whatever you do will impact their lives greatly.
  7. Know what type of punishment to deal out.Knowing the type of punishment is as important as knowing when to deal it out where and why. Kids should be punished appropriately and justly.
    • During gatherings and play times, try to lay down rules and punishments to teach them that every society needs law and order. Try to counsel them after the punishment and it should not be more dangerous than the crime committed.
    • Be a loving and caring person with discipline and tactfulness; even when you punish try to be the same good man or woman. Punishment should be known and make the kid to be part of the rules. Assure them that you love them and you want them to be good in their adult age.
  8. Appreciate the children when they do well just like you punish them when they go wrong.Tell them those things that are good and those things that seem wrong. Use your culture, the societal values and make them as welcoming as you can. Make them value others and make them know that no person is independent no matter you status. Make them tolerant to other people’s culture and make sure you are not telling them what you are not practicing. Be a role model.

Community Q&A

  • Question
    What do I do if its not my kid?
    Community Answer
    Just show them kindness. Being nice to someone, especially a child never hurt anyone.
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Date: 06.12.2018, 17:02 / Views: 83252